Did I reel you in with my post title?? Were you hoping for something scandalous?? I hope I don't let you down, but this post has nothing to do with anything literary.
As we get closer to the end of our 30 day revolution, I have to admit that I struggle with the gray area of eating. To me it seems very black and white-you eat sugar and processed foods or you don't. You either buy the junk or you don't. You either have diet coke or you don't. Isn't that nice and simple. A very boxed in way of thinking/living/eating. Unfortunately life isn't a neat little box. There are birthday parties, treat bags, candy that is used as a reward for good behavior. There are chocolate chip cookies, real chips, granola bars, and a multitude of food items that are masked as "healthy". There are mornings where I am so tired that the frozen waffles just seem like an okay choice. My struggle is what is acceptable. My struggle is where does the 20% of questionable eating really fall? These past few days I have allowed (yes, I do take full responsibility as I purchased these items at a check out counter) some food items back into the little hands of my little people that are not good. I will not make excuses. Well I will try not too. I will try not to rationalize the take out pizza. I will try not to beat myself up about the candy bars that I bought. But it is hard not to. I don't look at this as a failure. I try not to feel bad about it. But I do see how easy it is to slip right back into old habits fast!! I see how easy it is to get that pizza because I am tired and don't want to cook. I see how under the pressure of taking 5 kids to the grocery store a bribe at the check out lane seems like plain old survival instead of...well...a bribe with junk food. I see how buying the candy is giving my kids a very mixed message. That gray area-I just don't like it.
So what's a Mom to do? I will continue to shoot for my 80% of good eating/shopping/meal preparation. I will reserve that 20% for nights where I am tired or for those occasions that are out of my control. I will embrace that it doesn't have to be this or that. I will not feel guilty if I want a diet coke. It is an act of balance that does leave room for that gray area-an area that is flexible and not rigid. I am learning-and the learning will continue way after June 30th!! That is certain.